Back to the future

Here’s a photo for today.


I”m tired. We’re in the middle of a snow storm. I slammed the car into the driveway sideways when I got home over estimating the power I would need to get through the drift and up the hill into the drive way. For a second I thought I was stuck but the snow is still light enough I was able to back up sliding the out direction and get enough traction to get up the remainder of the drive than skinny over next to the garage – the only high ground in the parking area that will leave enough space for the plow guy to work. WHEW! I was nervous all the way home because it’s drifting pretty bad over by work and I was really concerned about getting home. Our road has not been plowed yet, fortunately other cars made a path before me.

My darling Autumn was standing out in the snow (of course) with her buddy Champ who was so white and fluffy he looked like Callie our big mare. The other two (older) horses were inside the shelter – snow less. she stayed outside while I gave them all hay and I humored her independence and put her hay out in the snow where she prefers it. I think she was happy to see me come back, she’s been very confident and curious every time I’ve gone out with them.

Did I mention that I’m tired? Sleepy at work and determined to build my life to the point where I want to be. That includes re-thinking and re-reading The 4-Hour Work Week, backing off the OT by 1/2 hour a day to leave my mornings free to work at home and plan my mornings activities for success. I was able to read through a chapter between calls at work and email myself this text. I love the quotes he used.

Once you say you’re going to settle for second, that’s what happens to you in life. -John F. Kennedy

Civilization had too many rules for me, so I did my best to rewrite them. -Bill Cosby

Everything popular is wrong. – Oscar Wilde, The Importance of Being Ernest

I can’t give you a surefire formula for success, but I can give you a formula for failure: try to please everybody all the time. – Herbert Bayard Swope, American editor and journalist; first recipient of the Pulitzer Prize.

Q&A: Questions and Actions
1. How has being “realistic” or “responsible” kept you from the life you want?
Not being wiling to sacrifice the horses in favor of a smaller apartment, more money to pay off debt and limiting myself in what I do right now to earn money.

2. How has doing what you “should” resulted in sub par experiences or regret for not having done something else?
I have sacrificed for relationships that were safe, when I should have been risking more on relationships that may have failed but had the potential to bring greater satisfaction and long-term happiness. I have improved other peoples lives and relationships at the cost of my own. Selfless? maybe. Do I regret it? Not entirely. The relationships I had/have provided me a certain set of limitations which felt like security. I have greatly benefited from them too.

I regret not following through on finding my muse and my getaway sooner.

I need to embrace myself and find happiness, then it won’t matter as much that I never found a partner who was willing to sacrifice for me.

3. Look at what you’re currently doing and ask yourself, “What would happen if I did the opposite of the people around me? What will I sacrifice if I continue on this track for 5, 10 or 20 years?”
I would be broke for a while. I’m going to have to consider this one longer.
I will sacrifice joy and happiness if I continue on this track another 5, 10 or 20 years. It’s time to break out of the cocoon.

I can hear a coyote outside and the cats are ready for dinner. They keep walking back and forth in front of the monitor.

Goodnight my friends.
All My Love


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